#Reflections: Haba! Abner!
“Haba, Abner! Why have you gone in to my father’s concubine?” Ishbosheth asked.
Ishbosheth was disturbed and uncomfortable. He wanted to know why Abner slept with his dad’s concubine.
Abner snapped. Ishbosheth’s question rattled him. “Am I a dog’s head that belongs to Judah? Today I show loyalty to the house of Saul your father, his brothers, and to his friends and have not delivered you into the hand of David; and you charge me today with a fault concerning this woman? May God do so to Abner, and more also, if I do not do for David as the Lord has sworn to him – to transfer the kingdom from the house of Saul and to set up the throne of David over Israel and over Judah, from Dan to Beersheba.”
Ishbosheth was shocked. His mouth opened wide, he could not close it. Haba! Abner! It was a simple question Abner. As in, Ki la gbe, ki le ju?! What has he said now that warranted all that venom?
He only asked what he was not clear about, what he believed was not completely satisfactory and what did he get? Curses!
His face dropped as he turned and walked to a corner. He was confused. His question was not answered, the issue he raised was not addressed, only the things that had been done to him were catalogued. He felt it was dodgy. He couldn’t utter a word.
What sort of answer was that to a simple question?! He processed it.
If he heard Abner right, he was saying that, the fact that he showed loyalty to Saul should have made him, Ishbosheth, look away from the fact that he was sleeping with his father’s wife. Hmmmn. The fact that he did not deliver him, Ishbosheth, to David was sufficient enough for him to shut up about bedding his father’s wife. Wow. The fact that he settled all his family members and friends should have made him wise enough not to question anything. Interesting. More like, ‘Look at all I did for you and you have the effrontery to accuse me of sleeping with a concubine! How dare you?’
Wow. He got the message.
Haba, Abner!
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Do you know any Abner?
Their reliability is closely tied to other benefits from you they feel entitled to. The kindness they show is premised on your gullibility and innocence. Their favor isn’t without a price tag. The benevolence they display is because of what they can explore and take advantage of. Their generosity is not without strings. You know any Abner?
You can’t question them. You can’t argue with them. You have been subtly imprisoned by their liberality, you are constrained to look away from how they are furtively exploiting you. You cannot ask for clarity about issues so you don’t rock the boat. You fear you have so much to lose if you query their excesses. You know any Abner?
Their largesse become a dread over you, you dare not counter their decisions or confront their immoral schemings. When you weigh how much you stand to lose, you become smart enough to overlook. You know any Abner?
Ishbosheth asked one inconvenient question and lost everything. He asked only one question and all privileges and special treats were withdrawn.
Hello Abner. Does your liberality imprison your subjects? Does your largesse box in those under you? Are they living in an unhealthy fear of you? Or can they be real with you when need be? Would you ‘transfer the kingdom’ elsewhere if they dare to query certain decisions they are not comfortable with?’
Hello Abner. Would you still be this generous to Ishbosheth if you didn’t have his father’s concubine to sleep with? Would he enjoy this benevolence if there were no strings attached? How much reproof can you take without him losing your niceties and kindness?
Or are you really a dog’s head that belongs to Judah, Abner?
Hello Abner.
II Samuel 3
We all have Abners in our lives. But when the yoke becomes too heavy around the neck,one day,we break free and dare to ask till we get an answer.
Do we all? As in no one immuned?
Are you an Abner? If you say you are not, can I then say, we all don’t have Abners? That’s some debate right there.
But I get you. In this selfish generation, I know there are no free lunches anywhere. Isn’t that sad and depressing?
I have been oh. Maybe the level of Abnerism is the question. Comes in subtle forms at different times. We have to consciously caution ourselves to respect people’s boundaries. Have you never been an Abner? 😂
Maybe AB, not ABNER. lol