I am innocent.

Nobody wakes up suddenly
And decides to steal $43 million.
Nobody.
It is not a magic wand waving experience
Or a spontaneous spiritual rehabilitation
That happens with the laying on of hands
It is a process
A slow, painful, repeated, rehearsed,
Fine- tuned, polished, organised process
Probably begins innocently…

Like when I was sent to buy biscuits
And I did not return the change
I mean it was just a few coins left
For sweets later in the week
Why return it, when I’ll ask for it again

Or when I hiked the school fees
To get a little extra for the term
I mean, no bills were sent to Daddy
He never cared for such anyway
Just return with the good grades
Why bother him with the details

I remember when I amended my CV
I really needed the job
My age was standing in the way
I got the job, I’m doing it well
Giving it my best shot
I mean, age is just a number

I was made the head of the team
Allowances for drivers and others with me
I knew what they needed
The size of rooms that will suit them
A driver should sleep in the car anyway
A little extra tip in the morning
And they were happy all week long

The training was cancelled
I was asked to keep the money
I mean, it was already in the budget
Why return it, the Director gave the directive
It was not my fault the training was cancelled
And I had been owed overtime for years

He was turning Fifty.
Fifty is a golden anniversary.
A lifetime milestone that had to be celebrated
I mean, how many people turn fifty in a lifetime
I used the official cars, the staff, the project funds
I had a thanksgiving service
Oh such beautiful colours, lifetime memories
God be praised

…..nobody wakes up suddenly
And decides to steal $43 million
Nobody
It is a process
A slow, painful, repeated, rehearsed,
Fine- tuned, polished, organised process
Where boundaries get moved, a little at a time
Where black becomes gray and a million shades
Where opportunities forcefully happen on us
Probably begins innocently…

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