The Reset Man Identity Audit Δ
THE RESET MAN IDENTITY AUDIT
Who initiated the separation/divorce?
Instructions
There are no wrong or right answers to the statements in this assessment.
Ensure you are in a calm and unhurried state before taking this assessment.
The assessment requires you to HONESTLY give responses that reflect your authentic self.
Answer truthfully for the most accurate reflection of your personality and your desires.
Section 1 - ATTACHMENT DYNAMICS Read the list of statements and, using the scale below, pick the grade that you feel corresponds to how you feel.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Neutral
Disagree
Strongly Disagree
1. I find it relatively easy to get emotionally close to others.
2. I often worry about being abandoned or not loved by my partner.
3. I find it difficult to fully trust others, even my partner.
4. I feel conflicted about being close to others, I want connection but also fear it.
5. I feel comfortable depending on others and having others depend on me.
6. I feel insecure if my partner doesn’t immediately respond to me.
7. I prefer not to rely on others and feel uncomfortable when they depend on me.
8. I sometimes push people away even though I deeply want their attention.
9. I am comfortable sharing my thoughts and feelings with my partner.
10. I tend to crave a lot of reassurance and affection in my relationships.
11. I often feel the need to keep emotional distance from others to feel safe.
12. I experience sudden mood changes in relationships, going from feeling secure to scared or confused.
13. I feel confident that my partner will support me when I need them.
14. I sometimes feel that I am more invested in the relationship than my partner.
15. I am uncomfortable with too much closeness and often push people away.
16. I have difficulty trusting people and fear they will hurt or abandon me.
17. I trust my relationships to be stable and secure, even when there’s temporary distance.
18. I often feel anxious when my partner is not available, even for short periods.
19. I value my independence and sometimes avoid sharing my feelings with my partner.
20. I often feel overwhelmed by emotions and struggle to express them clearly in relationships.
21. I am generally satisfied with the level of closeness in my relationships
22. I fear that my partner might not care about me as much as I care about them.
23. I find it challenging to be emotionally vulnerable, even with people I care about.
24. I tend to experience intense emotional reactions when I feel rejected or ignored.
Section 2 - LOVE LANGUAGE CHECK Read the list of statements and rate yourself from 0 - 10, with zero being the statement that least describes you and ten being the statement that most describes you.
1. I feel most loved when my partner gives me sincere compliments or affirming words.
2. I value handwritten notes, thoughtful texts, or verbal encouragement from my partner.
3. When I’m feeling down, kind and uplifting words help me bounce back.
4. I often replay in my mind the kind or loving things my partner has said to me.
5. Harsh words or criticism hurt me more than other forms of conflict.
6. I feel emotionally connected when we hold hands, hug, or cuddle.
7. A warm touch or kiss from my partner can shift my mood instantly.
8. Physical affection, even without sexual intimacy, helps me feel secure.
9. I often reach out to touch or be touched by my partner during the day.
10. When we’re physically distant for long periods, I feel less connected.
11. I feel deeply loved when my partner gives me thoughtful gifts, no matter the cost.
12. I cherish gifts because they show that my partner was thinking of me.
13. Special occasions mean a lot to me, and I value being surprised or remembered with a gift.
14. A small “just because” gift lifts my spirits and makes me feel seen.
15. I tend to feel disappointed when important dates are forgotten or overlooked.
16. I feel closest to my partner when we spend uninterrupted time together.
17. I value having meaningful conversations without distractions.
18. Shared experiences like date nights, walks, or trips strengthen our bond.
19. When my partner prioritizes time with me, I feel important and loved.
20. I get hurt when I feel like my partner is physically present but emotionally absent.
21. When my partner helps with chores or tasks, I feel cared for.
22. Actions speak louder than words—doing something for me shows love more than saying it.
23. I feel most loved when my partner anticipates my needs and steps in to help.
24. I appreciate when my partner takes initiative to lighten my load.
25. Broken promises to help or forgetting tasks can make me feel unappreciated.
Section 3 - PERSONALITY PROFILE Read the list of statements and rate yourself from 0 - 10, with zero being the statement that least describes you and ten being the statement that most describes you.
1. Many people think I am unemotional and blunt in relating with people and handling issues.
2. My work rate is high, able to work under pressure, taking risks or projects others think can’t be done.
3. I easily take the lead wherever I find myself and could get upset when goals are not met.
4. I usually ignore how people feel when I am chasing a goal or trying to get results.
5. I am very opinionated, and I can make decisions for others easily.
6. I love people and always want to make them happy.
7. I encourage people to work together and easily let go offences so we can move on
8. People notice me easily and love me because I am the life of the party wherever I find myself
9. I can motivate people to get things done.
10. I dislike rules and regulations that promotes dogma & tradition because I know there are other ways to get the job done
11. I naturally hate to offend people so I may be slow to confront issues because I am waiting for the right time to do it.
12. People see me as a slow starter and they think I don’t like change but I am steady, dependable, controlled
13. I love to work from the background without making noise about my accomplishment
14. I withdraw from aggressive situations, would rather allow peace reign than be confrontational
15. I am ambitious but I take my time and work at my pace
16. I am a perfectionist to the core, I can’t stand disorganized people.
17. I love to work based on rules and regulations and predetermined standards.
18. I need time to think and plan before embarking on any project of journey. I rarely would jump on a trip or any venture without a proper plan and reflection
19. I could be suspicious and critical of people, always weighing the intentions or motives behind whatever they do.
20. I am very detailed and thorough in whatever I do, always trying to do things right leaving no room for error
Section 4 - CONFLICT NAVIGATION TEST For each statement, choose the response that best describes how you feel or behave using the following scale:
1 - Rarely
2 - Sometimes
3 - Often
4 - Usually
5 - Always
1. I am willing to give up part of my position if the other person does the same.
2. I try to find a solution where both sides win something and lose something.
3. I look for the quickest way to settle the disagreement, even if it means a partial sacrifice.
4. I suggest splitting the difference to resolve the issue.
5. I seek to balance the concerns of both parties, even if neither is fully satisfied.
6. I am open to negotiating so both of us can meet halfway.
7. I avoid discussing problems and hope they resolve on their own.
8. I choose not to engage when a conflict arises, preferring to wait for it to pass.
9. I pretend the conflict isn’t important to avoid dealing with it.
10. I withdraw from arguments to keep the peace, even if the issue isn’t resolved.
11. I change the subject when the discussion becomes too heated.
12. I steer clear of people or topics that I know might lead to a conflict.
13. I insist on my viewpoint to make sure my position prevails.
14. I push hard to get what I want, even if others disagree.
15. I view disagreements as a competition and aim to come out on top.
16. I use my influence or authority to ensure that I win in conflict situations.
17. I focus on convincing others to accept my perspective.
18. I am more concerned about achieving my goals than maintaining harmony.
19. I put others' needs ahead of my own to avoid conflict.
20. I often give in to others, even when I have strong feelings about the issue.
21. I make sure others are satisfied, even if it means sacrificing my own preferences.
22. I try to maintain harmony by agreeing with the other person’s position.
23. I prioritize keeping the peace over asserting my own desires.
24. I downplay my own needs and focus on making others happy.
25. I encourage open discussion to explore solutions that benefit both sides.
26. I work with the other person to find a resolution that fully satisfies both of us.
27. I focus on understanding the other person’s point of view to come up with a mutually agreeable solution.
28. I take the time to discuss and resolve the issue, ensuring that both sides are happy.
29. I prioritize finding a creative solution that works for everyone involved.
30. I look for ways to incorporate both our ideas into the final decision.
Section 5 - ECHOES & PATTERNS INVENTORY Below are statements that reflect how you may think, feel, or behave in relationships.
1. I find it difficult to talk about how I feel, especially during disagreements.
2. I often feel emotionally tense or on edge in situations where I should feel safe
3. I feel the need to stay strong or “hold it together” even when I’m hurting.
4. I find it easier to avoid emotional conversations than to engage with them.
5. I have trouble naming or even recognizing some of my emotions in the moment.
6. When conflict or tension arises, I feel it strongly in my body (e.g., stomach knots, tight chest, headaches).
7. I tend to withdraw or shut down physically when I feel emotionally uncomfortable.
8. I struggle to relax or feel settled after an argument or emotional exchange.
9. My body often goes into “alert mode” when I sense disapproval or confrontation.
10. I sometimes avoid physical affection or closeness without knowing exactly why
11. I often question if I’m doing enough or being good enough as a spouse.
12. I struggle to make decisions confidently, especially when there’s disagreement.
13. I react quickly to protect myself in situations that feel emotionally charged.
14. I tend to repeat habits or reactions that don’t serve me, even when I want to change.
15. I often feel responsible for keeping the peace, even when I’m not at fault.
16. Growing up, emotional issues were rarely discussed or openly processed.
17. I was expected to behave, comply, or stay quiet to keep things peaceful.
18. Expressions of anger or sadness were often met with silence, punishment, or shame.
19. My caregivers or family members avoided hard conversations or brushed things under the rug.
20. I learned early on that love and acceptance were often tied to performance or obedience.
21. I find it hard to believe that my needs matter as much as my partner's.
22. I try to avoid conflict even when something genuinely bothers me.
23. I sometimes over-function or “take on too much” to feel worthy or accepted.
24. I feel unsafe or uncertain when things get emotionally intense, even if no one is being harmful.
25. I notice I’m repeating certain relational patterns I saw in my parents or caregivers.
Section 6 - RELATIONAL BELIEFS & NARRATIVE AUDIT These statements reflect beliefs and perspectives about relationships.
1. It is safer not to depend on anyone
1. It is safer not to depend on anyone
2. Vulnerability can be used against you
3. I believe I have to protect myself in relationships
4. I feel safer when I rely only on myself
5. I believe trust is difficult to maintain
6. Relationships are more stressful than fulfilling
7. I believe most relationships eventually fail
8. I feel I have been unlucky in relationships
9. I expect disappointment in relationships
10. I feel people eventually show their negative side
11. I need to be in control for things to work
12. I expect to be misunderstood in relationships
13. I believe I must always be strong in a relationship
14.I believe expressing needs can create problems
15. I feel like relationships demand too much from me
16. Love requires sacrifice more than enjoyment
17. I feel I give more than I receive
18. I feel relationships limit my freedom
19. I feel safer when I rely only on myself
20. It is hard for people to truly love someone long-term
21. I believe relationships require constant effort to survive
22. I think relationships are worth the effort when both people are intentional
23. Women are difficult to understand
24. Love is not as simple as people make it seem
25. I struggle to believe someone can accept me fully
Submit Form
