21 Habits Happy Married Couples Have That They Hardly Share Or Talk About

21 Habits of super-happy couples

  1. They play a lot.

By that I mean tickle-me-till-tears-drop kind of play. They are best of friends and buddies more than they are husband and wife.

They chase each other around the house for nothing sake and poke fun at each other.

Sometimes he is in the living room belting some off-key notes with the remote control as microphone, serious as nuclear war while she is rolling on the floor laughing to stupor, ‘you can’t even sing to save your life!’

Sometimes she would break into an exclusive seductive dance with no music trying to do a Beyonce or Riri. They play around with silly nicknames, change facial expressions, or tone of voice just to make their partner laugh.

They tease each other, comfortable in their vulnerability and relaxed in their childishness.

They inject humor in supposedly serious matters and just laugh it off.


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  1. They have a sly code

It’s some communication sign that is exclusively theirs and useful when they have company or are in a social function. It’s an expression, some hint or motion that notifies the partner about what to say or not to say. It could be an unusual stretch, or a scratch on the jaw, or a raised eyebrow that sends a message only the partner can decode.




  1. They gossip

Yes, they gossip.

Those thoughts they couldn’t express in the presence of others, those sentiments they couldn’t share in public, all that exaggerated politeness is over when they enter their zone. They let it all out. You would be amazed at how much gist and gossip these two share. And yes, they gossip about you too, laugh at your silly jokes and senseless innuendos.


  1. They forgive each other

Arguments are bound to happen. Conflicts are inevitable.

They make up after an argument. They are quick to say Sorry. And they don’t just verbalize their apologies, they add effect to it by change in behavior.



  1. They hug more than twice a day.

No rules restrict them. They hug anywhere, they hug anytime, and they hug anyhow. When they see each other after work, when they meet up at any function, when they complete a task together. They need no reason, they need no patronage.

Make a mistake of letting them stand by each other for any couple of minutes, just watch, it won’t take long before the electrical connections and wirings inside their bodies begin to gravitate towards each other. Next thing you notice the gaps between them have been closed and his arm drapes over her shoulder and hers go round his waist. And you know the amazing part, they are not even aware.


  1. They go to events together.

They plan their outings. They try as much as possible to attend same events. For them, that’s how they make more memories. And be warned, they observe and record everything going on at the event and build up their gist items for the night. And that leads to their number 9 habit:

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  1. They are gist partners

It’s official. The same way people sign official papers to become business partners, these two have it written in their marriage certificate that they are gist partners. He hears or sees anything funny and he just can’t wait to share with her.

Just like ruminant animals, cattle, sheep, goats, buffalo and camels have a digestive system that is uniquely different from humans, this couple also have a digestive ‘gist’ system that is different from the normal average couple. Instead of one compartment to the stomach ruminants have four. Four different angles of looking at issues and gist. They have a ‘rumen’ that is filled with billions of tiny microorganisms that are able to break down any gist and other coarse matters about people and friends that couples with one stomach cannot digest.

They will air their views at social events but will not completely chew it well. The partially chewed gist goes into their large ‘rumen’ and it is stored there till they get home. When they get to the comfort of their home and have pulled off all the formalities in form of clothing, you will hear her say, “Did you hear what Clara said at that meeting?’ And that is the commencement of some juicy dissection of the day’s activities.

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  1. They drive in one car, most of the times.

Even if they have a dozen in the garage, they ensure they use one whenever they are together. And if they get to an event separately, they would not mind leaving one car behind and going home in the same car.


  1. They do date nights at least twice a month

Date nights, movie nights are some of the fuel they use in running the engine of their union. It is sacrosanct. It is their way of reminding themselves life is not about bills and needs.


  1. They call each other by pet names.

And not just Honey, Sweetheart, or Baby, they use titles sometimes like, ‘The only Lolo in Chukwuemeka’s kingdom or the Enenebe eje olu or Olori laafin Akintayo. Even if it’s used to curry favour, or to beg for treats, as long as it makes their partner giggle or chuckle, it’s just fine.


  1. They touch each other a lot

Whether in private or public their hands are touching something, somehow somewhere. The touch could be sneaky or freaky disregarding the presence of a third party. He touches her bum if she passes by. He ‘mistakenly’ brushes her boobs in an attempt to pick the remote control. He would mischievously place his hand on the space she is about to sit on (just to feel her backside), acts innocent when she jumps up startled and then he laps up her apologies. He’s not spared from her roving hands too.

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  1. They go to bed at the same time.

It’s their routine Pillow Talk time, where they peel up each detail of the day. It could start from Mat’s hilarious off-beat dance steps at the birthday party to Iyogo’s smart answers at management meeting to more somber discussion on their daughter’s school requests. And they could slowly change gear to talking about their dreams and goals, their finances and plans for the future. Pillow Talk is a roller coaster ride. But the ride finds them locked in each other’s arms when it’s all over, comforting and reassuring, encouraging and praying. Sometimes few tears will be kissed away, sometimes some dose of positive, hopeful words would be shared and sometimes a passionate love-making is just what seals the night. Pillow Talk time is a blend of different kinds of emotions, unpredictable, unrehearsed and unalloyed.


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  1. They say ‘I love you’ to each other.

They text it often. They say it often. They show it often. They end their phone conversations with it. They end their text messages with. They never tire out of using the three magic words.


  1. They say Thank You a lot

They do not take each other for granted. It’s customary for them to say Thank You for any act of kindness done. Before and after meals, after errands, for a mail sent, for a task completed, for a bill paid, for a courtesy gesture etc. Gratitude is highly rated in their union. And yes, even after a beautiful love-making, they say Thank You.


  1. They enjoy the company of mutual friends,

It could be a lunch eat-out or they go to watch movies with them and do karaoke with them. They do not miss out in get-togethers, any opportunities to get some laughs and a few drinks.

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  1. They do conversations and not confrontations.

They resolve their fights, issues or quarrels through conversations and not confrontations. They know the difference between ‘You always leave your boxers on the floor,’ and ‘I don’t like it when you leave your boxers on the floor.’

He knows he might have to ask, ‘Are you okay? Is anything the matter?’ four or seven times before she responds at all. So he is patient to wait. She knows to keep quiet when he is rattling on like that because he is upset. So she waits her turn. They attack the issue and not themselves. They do not fight to see who wins the argument, they fight to win each other.


  1. Cuddle in the mornings and evenings

It’s therapeutic. It’s their bonding mechanism. The oxytocin released during the period carries them through the day and helps them sleep well at night.


  1. They support each other.

They got each other’s back 24/7. They are each other’s biggest fan. They provide emotional, financial, mental support for each other. They support each other’s career, passion and dreams. He would stoop to make her great. She would bend to see him stand. They are each other’s best bib and tucker, rooting for her all the way, eulogizing him every step of the way.


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  1. They hit a home run

They do it with clockwork precision. From first base kissing to second base to the fourth base. Whether short or long sessions, quickies in the kitchen or bathroom, sneakies more often than not. Sometimes in the morning before they leave for work. He might get to work and look really goofy. Sometimes he is in a board meeting where important decisions are being made but he just has that mischievous smile on his face. It’s not your dry joke that’s making him look like that, he is just remembering what he did before coming to work and the state he left his wife.

There is no time-table, no scheduling, and no rules. And each time it’s delivered fresh, hot and sizzling. They know not to use it as punishment. They know not to hold back once the other is in the mood.



  1. They pray together.

They settle a whole lot on their knees. It’s their powerhouse and they don’t joke about it. They have a regular time. They have a regular place. It’s their sanctuary. It’s their altar. When they pray together, they know they can conquer anything.




  1. They take a lot of selfies. lol

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Which one in the list strikes you, feel free to comment.

You feel I left some out? Be my guest, add them in the comment box.

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Written by juwonodutayo

Writer. Tutor. Speaker. Blogger. Roger Federer Fan.


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  1. 21. They Fight- Haba! How can they not fight? This your list is errrr oju aye list o. They fight! And they fight well!!!

    And they make up, of couse.

    Thank you.


  2. Very interesting read. It resonates with us so much. I must say the dose of humour here and there makes it a fun read too. Fantastic write up man. Stay blessed.

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